Pulling the cloth off the table

Are you familiar with the magic trick of pulling the cloth off the table and nothing moves, breaks or falls off the table?  Great attention getter....if you can pull it off (no pun intended...okay...just a tad).  The trick is similar to juggling.  For the experienced practitioner,  the challenge is how many items can you juggle and/or how many different items can you juggle.  For the less experienced, the challenge is: what can you afford to drop.  I jokingly tell people at work: "I can juggle, the question is do you want the Fostoria Crystal or the Corelle Ware to hit the floor?".

I think we sometime view our Christianity as a juggling act or tablecloth pulling act.  If we don't perform the trick correctly and we break something, we want to yell at the magician who taught us the trick.  I understand the physics and science of juggling and tablecloth pulling but I don't try either trick with breakable objects.  I'm not that skilled.  I have a great deal of respect and appreciation for those who can perform either trick.

Christian life is very much a juggling act: worshiping a magnificent, unbounded God, getting "pulled" off the table by life; slapped in the face by illness, disease, or death; dreams crushed or delayed.  Some might think it offensive to question God about life events such as a father being taken from a daughter; death of a spouse due to an aggressive, terminal illness; a failed crop that was supposed to provide financial benefit.

 I do not have a rock solid, verifiable, concrete answer to why "bad" things happen to Christians other than Christians live in a sinful world.  Yes, I know that might be considered a cheesy, easy out answer.  What I do know, by personal experience, is God is always with you listening to your heart, mind, and voice.  God doesn't take offensive when you question why.  Think about this for a moment: God freely gave His Son to die a horrible, painful death for His creation.  Don't you think God is touched by our illness, suffering, and losing a loved one?

Yes, it is difficult to wake up day after day when your life has been touched by illness, suffering, death, or broken dreams.  Acknowledging who has allowed you to wake up and have another day of life makes getting up possible.  I believe one of the greatest witnesses a Christian has is their response to life's challenges.  Do you get angry and ticked off and then stay that way?  Do you get upset, yell and scream, and then turn to God for guidance, support, and endurance?

There a two women, Mrs. T and Mrs. N, in my church who are, to me, examples of asking God for guidance, support and endurance.  Mrs. T has been in remission from breast cancer for several years but  the cancer has recently returned in her bones.  Mrs. T always seems to have a pleasant spirit even on her "bad" days when the cancer is bothering her.  My thought is: if Mrs. T can get up each day and present a pleasant spirit in spite of the pain and disease, so can I.

The other woman, Mrs. N, has lupus and is in some degree of pain most of the time.  She is also an encouragement when I look at her: she always seems to have a smile on her face or presents a pleasant spirit through her pain.  Mrs. N causes me to view my problems as insignificant compared to daily being in pain.

From listening to their testimony, I know each has a security that God is in control and will take care of them either by providing them the strength to daily participate in life or provide them a painless life with Him.  I'm sure, based on human nature, each has their days when they get discouraged and feel they have been "pulled off the table".  Their pleasant spirit seems to indicate they don't "stay on the floor".  Instead, each asks God for strength to live another day, witness to another person, love their spouse one more day and give a kind word to a stranger.  Last but not least each acknowledges God is in control and is the daily provider of their strength, endurance and life.

Yet Another Confession

Okay, so I confess. I am a dripper. I am that person who cannot fill my coffee cup without dripping all over the floor, cabinet, or whatever else may be in the vicinity. As a matter of fact, it is such a common place thing that I almost feel like the ritual is incomplete without a splash or two to warm my toes. Strange I know.

There is something almost barbaric about it. A certain sense of defiance in this small little act, a declaration that, “Yes, I have coffee, the pot shall never run dry, and I care nothing for a few wasted drops that may stain the floor.” I didn’t mean to be a dripper. For years I fought against it, experimenting with ways of pouring that would prevent the waste of this almost sacred liquid. The really odd thing is I finally discovered a way to avoid this potentially embarrassing habit. Okay, so it was really Nathan who revealed to me that if I raised the lid a bit it would not drip.

And so now that I know this, I have a choice to make with each and every cup, and in the course of my day this is many. To lift or not to lift, that is the question, but I find myself reluctant to lift. Sure I have to go back and wipe down the counters and mop up the floor, but I like to drip. This morning, as I felt the comforting warmth on my toes, I considered why this is an issue.

A few of you, I am sure, are citing a tendency towards rebellion, and I can’t completely disagree. But against who or what am I rebelling? That is the crux of the matter. My tidy husband? God? Society in general? Where is it written that dripping coffee is a bad thing? As I began to really ponder the matter, I realized something.

So much of my life is marked by scrimping and saving. Trying to get me to release a dollar for more than an absolute necessity is difficult, as a matter of fact, spending more than twenty dollars for anything other than groceries makes me ill. When it comes to money, I have a financial goal, not the least of which is to pay off my student loans while still feeding my children. It’s the one issue that can make me worry, and not without cause. I have been in those places where meals where nothing but Ramen noodles and I was rolling coins for gas money. If you were to go over my finances for the last ten years you would wonder how I managed to exist at all. It is a modern retelling of the loaves and fish, baffling and nonsensical without the interference of the Father.

Please don’t think I am sharing this to evoke any sort of pity. I have survived, flourished even at times, but always with the knowledge that I was completely dependent on God’s provision. It is one of those facts that I have accepted with a certain sort of resignation, but one that can overwhelm me if I dwell on it for too long.

However, in all of those times, not once did I go without coffee. And if you know me at all you will know that I include coffee as one of God’s greatest gifts to humanity. It’s always been like a seal or sign that he hasn’t forgotten me, no matter how bad other circumstances may be. As long as there is coffee I know that he is still watching over me. I guess it is my own personal form of manna, it appears each day in the measure sufficient for that time, and I know that while there may not be too much of a selection on today’s menu the essentials are there.

So I drip. I let that precious fluid fall in exuberant excess on my counter, floor, and feet. It is my tangible way of saying I have faith that he will not fail me. There will always be a steaming cup to hold to as I sit in my quiet place and commune with him. It is my declaration that I believe there will be a fresh pot tomorrow, or in a few hours. He loves me and provides even this seemingly frivolous token of his affection for me.

And I think this is truth we all need to contemplate from time to time. God is affectionate towards us, indulging our special tastes and desires. He fills our lives with small tokens of his care, so small they are easily overlooked and can go unappreciated. And yet there they are. Steaming away within our grasp and filling our world with wonderful aromas and tastes. In world full of monstrous trials and grand truths that is easy to discount or devalue this small pleasure, and yet what is more intimate than his provision for our simple delights? What speaks more clearly of a lover and friend?

It is humbling and glorifying in the same breath taking moment. The God of Creation loves me this much, this greatly and deeply so that my cup runneth over, and I am glad.

I'm still surprised after all these years

Recently I have experienced a life event associated with work.  The event requires me to exercise my faith in God's ability to provided.  This past Sunday our pastor presented 2 excellent sermons on faith: "What Faith Knows" based on Mark 4:35-41 and "Faith by Example" from Luke 22:31-34.  These sermons were exactly what I needed at the moment.

I don't know why I'm surprised that God would speak through someone to provide words of comfort and encouragement.  I find I'm still surprised that God still speaks to me personally even after hearing so many beneficial sermons.  I'm sure others experience this surprise.

It is not surprising that God cares for each and every believer.  This is a characteristic of His being and nature.  His word clear states God is concerned about our well-being.  A classic example is Matthew 6:25-34.  What about God's provision for His people in the wilderness?  Think about it for at least a second: sandals that don't wear out, enough food to feed all the people provided each morning, and water from a rock.

I hope I never get to where I'm not surprised how God takes care of us.  I think that would be stop me from being thankful and appreciative of God's care.

Author's note: In case your interested in the major points of the 2 sermons. The sermon titles and point titles are from the pastor.  The wording is from my notes.


What Faith Knows  Mark 4:35-41

• God cares - God cares about your daily "stuff"
• God can - Deep faith knows God can handle "it"
• God controls - Faith knows God is in control even if we don't

Faith by Example  Luke 22:31-34

• Pray for another's faith - Jesus prayed for Peter
• Encourage another's faith - Jesus encouraged Peter to strength others

Stumbling over obstacles...again

Why is it Christians seem to have a hard time holding onto God's hand and believing in His loving care for us?  One day we have been granted a victory over a tough situation but then the next day presents an obstacle that seems to big to overcome.

We seem to immediately forget what God has done for us and brought us through.  We focus on the obstacle and begin worrying about "what if", "Should I have...", "how will I...".  We don't seem to remember scripture that promises God will take care of us.  The lilies of the field don't make clothing but God adorns them with splendid covering.  The sparrows don't plant seed or tend a garden but God provides them food.  Very simple but powerful examples of God taking care of His creation.

We were created by God from the dirt of the Earth.  We were formed from nothing and have been given a place of honor, in His creation, as overseers.  We are more important to God than the flowers or birds.  Therefore, we should take comfort that He will provide for us; it may not be fancy food, the latest fashion style, or a big house but our basic needs will be met.  For our part, we must remember to honor Him, thank Him for his provision, and testify to His care for us.  Anything less would be a disservice to Him and make us appear as ungrateful.

Putting it all Together - Part 8 No Smoking, please. Or “What if we are all God’s dream and He wakes up?”

Putting a dream in to motion is not something you can do all by yourself. Even Joan of Arc had to recruit a few troops. Convincing people that you really are following a God given vision isn’t always easy. I mean not to be harsh, but most people have never really struck out to do something bold and audacious in order to be who they want to be. Most people are content to look around, find the expected and easy path for their lives, and stick to it.

So when you come along and declare, “Follow me and France will have victory”, people tend to think you are psych case. The truth is if you chose to give life to your dreams, you are not normal, and that’s a scary thing for our friends and family to face. This why it is often hardest to tell the ones you love about this personal vision. We know that they know all our flaws, our stupid mistakes, and all the reasons we aren’t qualified to do this.

I wish I could tell you to be bold and all will end well, but as we all know even Joanie’s world got a little heated due to her boldness. But way before that she had people who believed in her, who followed her, people who used their power and connections to help her pursue her vision. My question is do you have the audacity to demand to be heard in the courts of the king? Are you that passionate about your quest? Or are you content to stay home and whisper it to the chickens? If there is a stake in your future are willing to face it, content in the knowledge that you did everything possible to make it happen?

You have to tell people about your dreams. You have to be willing to face the skeptical faces, questions full of doubt, and you have to be bold. It means talking to everyone, and I do mean everyone, about what you intend to do. You tell your friends, your family, and the stranger at McDonald's because people are the key to seeing the dream take flesh.

One of the truly amazing things I have discovered is that God has way of bringing the right people into your life, if you are looking for them. Consistently he has placed people in our path who have a talent or ability that we needed to make a certain aspect of Pagus happen, and often the people we thought would be the ones to fill these roles are the first ones who run screaming to the hills.

I cannot over emphasize this point. It feels awkward, even arrogant, to go around telling people that you are capable of doing something as awesome as fulfilling this dream, but you have to find the words to share that vision. You have to find a way to make others see this dream as a reality. They have to have something to believe in and since you were the one entrusted with this vision that job is yours.

In some ways this is the most fun part of all of this. You get to share your vision, your hope, and somehow in just speaking the words it becomes even more of a reality through just saying it aloud. You can get so caught up in describing the dream that you can forget you have an audience, and in those moments people find your passion contagious.

In other ways, it is the most difficult. I still find myself stuttering through a simple presentation I have given over and over again when I am introducing myself and Pagus to a new audience. I start filling the blanks of a conversation with what I imagine that other person must be thinking about me. I interpret their questioning looks as amused dismissal of me and my ideas. So when I say, you have to break that habit, know I am speaking from a place of experience and not throwing any stones.

Some could argue that Joan of Arc was terrible failure. I mean after all, all most of us really know about her is that she burned at the stake, but the point is hundreds of years later, we know her. We remember her, and I would have to say that is a victory. I hope yours and my dreams have happier endings, but if we are remembered, if following our dreams is noteworthy in history, isn’t that some sort of victory? Think about it, one nobody country girl from Nowheresville, France changed a nation just because she was willing to follow her dream, to speak passionately about the things she believed God called her to do.

The Bible says the power of life and death are in the tongue, and nowhere is this more evident than in the lives of our dreams. How else to do they come to life unless we give it to them through our words?

When my youngest daughter was four, she asked “What if we all just God’s dream and He wakes up?” After I recovered from my aneurysm, I realized the truth of what she was asking. God is by no means asleep, but even you and I are his dream, one he gave life to through his words. Think about it, what if he had never spoke up?

Lessons learned from rounding up cattle

My Long Term Spouse (LTS), myself and her brother have a small herd of cows.  Recently, we needed to round them up.  Our cows are pampered - hay when the temperature drops and feed pellets fed by hand.  We can easily round them up just by calling them and shaking a feed bucket filled with pellets.

The herd easily went into the pen where the pellets were plentiful.  One older, stubborn cow refused to come into the corral.  I shut the gate on the other cows, who were busy eating, but didn't chain the gate closed and turned my attention to the stubborn cow.  One of the cows in the corral decided she was full and it was time to stage a jail break.  She headed toward the closed, unchained gate and pushed the gate open.  The jail breaker charged into the open pasture with 2 additional escapees following her.

At times are we not like the escaped cows?  God provides a roof over our heads and food on our table but we want what is on the other side of the gate.  We see a gap and we charge through the gate forgetting what God has provided.  We want to see what we can find, experience, or do for ourselves.

Just as we had to round up the escapees, God rounds us up and returns us to the safety and comfort of the corral.  God does not punish us but allows us to learn from our mistakes.  I'm glad I have a God who lovingly seeks me out, provides safety and allows me to learn from my "bull headedness".